When is “Self-Care” Dangerous Territory?

Hello Lovlies, Today I want to talk about how important Self-Awarness A.K.A “self-care” can be for our over all mental health and spirituality, when done for that purpose and not as a cover up. So lets talk!

Most importantaly over all eles is that by no means “self-care” a one size fits all situation, we are all as they say “build different”.

I would like to begin with what “Self-care” really means. It’s taking the time to do things that help you live well and improve both your physical health and mental health like creating art if that’s what warms your heart or going for a morning jog. This doesn’t need to be pre-planed or extravengent event. It could simply be, stepping outside for a moment to take a breath of fresh air for a quick recharge. or curlling up with your kiddo’s to watch another Universal Studio’s movie that has been watched litterly a hundred times before. Today we all went out for a walk by the river to take instagram photos but honestly it doubles as a chance to connect to nature and recharge our connection as a family. When it comes to your mental health, self-care can help you manage stress or anxity, lower your risk of illness, and increase your energy when done in a matter that really helps to clear your mind, body and soul.

Here are my best-loved “self-care” thnings that I do: I often fall deep into writting (writting litterly anything), stepping outside a few moments each day or going for short walks, reading, reasearching things for my work or what peeks my intrest that day, long hot showers, praying, talking to my plants, pugs and siamese cats and most of all spending time with my partner and children!

However, there can be potential dangers or pitfalls associated with “self-care” when or if it is taken to an extreme or approached in an unbalanced manner. Here are a few potential dangers to be mindful of:

Ignoring Underlying Issues: Instead of listening to what your body, mind and soul need when taking a rest when you need it, or you feel the need to push yourself into engaging in all sorts of “self-care” activities that you really don’t feel up to. Like needing to go for a run every day, tone your arms, double-down on my skin regimen, cook homemade organic meals everyday, getting a manicure, drinking some kind of green juice (yukk, lol), and meditating regularly, etc. or over schedualing events that take you away from your family time, can lead to things that make you feel “socity” expects you to do, but are not going to serve your body, mind and soul the way it needs to. They may provide some temporary relief from stress and social anxiety, but it is important to address the root causes of these issues. If self-care becomes a way to avoid or ignore underlying problems that may lower your immune system from not actually relaxing, eatting well or getting enough sleep may prevent you from seeking the necessary help or making necessary changes in your life.

Perfectionism and Self-Criticism: Some individuals may approach “self-care” with a perfectionistic mindset, setting unrealistic expectations for themselves like going to the gym multiple times a week because that’s what their favorite influenser does, when realisticly it’s not managable to balance in their other resposibilities. This can lead to feeling like a failure, self-criticism, and increased stress. It’s important to remember that self-care should be gentle and compassionate, allowing for imperfections and self-acceptance. Spontanious or planed can be a great idea when it’s realistic to you along with space for back up plans when life’s chaos happends! Because lets face it. It will, we all just follow a Fools journey through life’s Chaos!!!

Escapism and Avoidance: This refers to specific behaviors that some people may use to ensure that they are not getting involved in hiding from obstacles or responsibilitiesspecific, or that they can escape a situation they have already entered (which can be good if you are on a date that is making you feel uncomfotable). These behaviors can also refer to people who actively avoid difficult feelings and emotions such as a natural coping mechanism for anxiety, pain, trauma, facing fears and other mental health situations.. Avoidance behaviors can be a sign of underlying mental health issues like depresstion or un diagnoised illness for my self it was a combo of low iron and Fibbroids! The problem that some people don’t realize is that this can cause some negative energy around them, like avoiding new job opportunities, career advancements, opening to new relationships, social opportunities, recreational activities, or family get-togethers. While self-care activities can be helpful in managing emotions, lowering stress and benifit your mind set to new perspectives. It is important to remember not to rely on them as a means of escaping or avoiding what needs to be done like house work, going to school or going work, which can ultimately lead to further negative consequences such as loosing our path that we are meant to follow and missing out on key oppertunities that could bring us abundance of love, joy and success.

Financial Burden: Certain forms of “self-care”, such as gambling, alchohol, over spending, luxury vacations, or expensive beauty products, can come with a significant financial cost. If self-care activities become financially burdensome and lead to financial instability or debt, it can have a negative impact on overall health and well-being and throw you off your spiritual journey. I know first hand this can become a problem, for myself it was take out food to avoid cooking for myself and then my two young children at the time as a single mom. It was more about the effects of our health then finacially, but to think back at all that take out. We could of had a nice simple family vaccation and made wonderful memories together instead. Live & Learn is all we can do and keep moving forward.

Isolation and Social Withdrawal: While self-care often is sometimes thought of as spending time alone to recharge and relax to self reflect as a positive choice to recharge. But excessive isolation and social withdrawal can also be detrimental to mental health. It’s important to maintain a balance between alone time and social interaction to prevent feelings of loneliness and isolation. For myself I thrive on my alone time with my thoughts and forgetting the world exisit for a brife moment but thats just me and could be you as well but if you feel recharged by others around you and having a good time out with friends does the trick so be it. Don’t force a unwanted feelings because you feel it’s socially expected as the “self-care” rule because it’s not!

To ensure that self-care remains beneficial and healthy to you and you alone. It is crucial to practice it in moderation, be mindful of your needs and your limitations. Don’t be ashamed to seek professional help if or when necessary. Remember that “self-care” is SELF-AWARNESS that should support your overall well-being rather than becoming an obsession or a way to escape from reality as it is.

Take care of your mind, body and soul they go together like crackers and crackers!!
Have a wonderful magical day!!
Tamsy Fae xo